Happy Holidays

I'm always reminded this time of year, just how truly blessed we are.

 

And busy!

 

Seems like the holidays started after Jaxon's birthday and just kept going...

 

Here's a recap.

 

The kids had their first 'official holiday school program'. Honestly, I was giddy inside. Probably more excited than they were, but that's why they do these programs, right? For the parents? So we can brag about how cute our kids were?

 

And they were.



 

Jaxon was the perfect reindeer (that's him on the end next to the long line of girlfriends).

Kiley. Well, she'll get it someday. This year she chose to just stare, starstruck at the crowd of people, and shake her jingle bells. She sings in the car or shower instead of on stage. And I think that's just fine considering I faked my way through my sixth grade band concert playing the oboe. I was the only one so I figured nobody would know.

We also ventured to the Holidazzle Parade this year. It was a balmy 38 degrees and rainy- that's weather in Minnesota for ya!

And I even decided to get in touch with my crafty side this year and made our own countdown calendar. Which clearly I need to explain better to the kids- it isn't a mix and match, take whatever treat you want and complain if you don't get it calendar. But I guess we'll tackle that one next year.

Next, I headed up to Fargo with the kids the weekend before Christmas. We had our usual cookie making festivities, some games, lots of time with family, and of course, presents!

The Cook Nook was officially open for business with Zoe as the Head Manager, Jaxon as the Assistant Manager, and Kiley as the Worker Bee (she basically had no say in anything.). Jaxon was only fired once or twice by Zoe, but I think he used his authority to fire Kiley more than a few times.

 

There was no perfect photo. This was about as close as we got for the three of them before Sammy started jumping all over them.  

Jaxon was pretty excited with Uncle Cory's gift- a new acoustic guitar. We fashioned him a pick from the cardboard box and a strap from a bow, and he was set. We've been enjoying rock concerts ever since. Goes well with the new microphone we got him!

 And of course he had to help Kiley with all her gifts (as if she couldn't do it herself).

It seemed like way to quick of a trip, and far too few games of Quirckle were had. But we were anxious to get home to see Scott, who did not make the trek with us. We got home just in time Sunday to meet up with Scott's family at the Peking Garden for dinner, where I was quite thankful they gave us the table at the far back of the restaurant. Our kids were a bit too hyped up for Santa to come and they seemed to be bouncing off the walls! Or under the tables...

 But there were lots of hugs and kisses!

It seemed fitting of a family photo since it was the first time in awhile that all of us were there, including Allen! Welcome to the family Allen.

 The next day, Christmas Eve, after a short and unproductive work day, we took the kids outside to disperse their reindeer food. Instructions were to scatter the glittery mixture into the snow, creating a path so that the reindeer could see it glitter from teh sky and find us.

 Then, we laid out some milk and cookies and pretzel rods for Santa...

 And it must have worked!

Jaxon got the Mario Brothers video game he had been asking for and Kiley got a new baby doll. Of course there were some other surprises in the stockings- new toothbrushes and Gushers... marshmellows for Kiley and some other fun toys, which surprisingly, they have been playing with every day. Guess we were getting kind of boring. Glad we could step it up a notch as I haven't heard much whining since Christmas...

 

And a few days later, on the way to daycare, Jaxon said, 'Mommy, I think we need to find another one of those shooting stars so we can wish on it and wish for Christmas to be everyday.'

 

 I was about to explain to him that the spirit of Christmas can be with you everyday, but he was already on to the next question... maybe I'll tackle that one next year!

 

no words

Though there have been many opinions... many tweets... and many posts on facebook about what happened last Friday at the Newtown, CT school, for me, there are simply no words.

Only tears and sadness.

And hope.

As I painfully watched our President speak about the shooting of innocent children, teachers, and school administrators, all I could think of was those parents who had to show up at the school looking for their child, and not finding them.

And before me flashed all of my hopes and dreams for my children...

Kiley and Jaxon,

I hope that you never have to hear about a school shooting on the evening news... have to learn about it from your friends at school, or have to experience it yourself.

I hope you never feel scared to walk down the streets or play in your own home.

I hope you follow your dreams... become a scientist or a rock star, a nurse or a teacher... I hope you find the love of your life and never let them go. I hope you travel the world, try new foods, learn to speak Spanish or Chinese, and walk across the Great Wall of China. I hope you have babies of your own and hold them close every morning before school and every night before bed.

And I hope you never know the sadness that our country undoubtedly felt this past week...

For the families involved in this terrible tragedy, including those first responders, those who were left behind, and yes, even those family members of the shooter... I hope you find peace and comfort in God's hands, if not now, then someday.

Five

Dear Jaxon,

Today is your 5th birthday! I can't believe you're five years old already! The time has flown by, and yet I remember so many things about your first five years...

I remember leaving the hospital with you when you were born with all the nervousness of new parents... only to discover that my car had stalled and needed a jump... and then to come home to three feet of snow in the driveway! I remember sitting with you in the backseat while we watched daddy shovel ;-)
And I remember your special hiding place in the kitchen of our house in Maple Grove... the pantry. Where you'd go to play with tupperware, hide your toys, play hide and seek, and do your 'duties'...

I remember picking you up from Darlene's and fighting with you to get you in the car. I used to think the whole neighborhood was watching. This crazy mom whose kid didn't want to go home with her at night. And how awful it made me feel. (glad those days are behind us!)

I remember your excitement and hesitation when your baby sister was born. How you clung to me just a little bit more. But also how you protected her and told everyone about how you were her big brother.

I remember all the times you've gotten sick...all the times you've come to watch me race... all the 'firsts'... traveling with you to Carol's and to Vancouver... all the excitement in your eyes when you've caught a fish, gone on a ride, or just discovered something new.

I'm sure you'll realize someday, that your parents have taught you a lot about life.

But it's you who has taught us even more. You've taught us that elves can be magical. That God holds the sun and the moon, one in each hand. You've taught us that time doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things- yesterday could be a year ago and tomorrow could be next week. Does it really matter? You've taught us about loving and supporting each other, 'no matter what' as you say.

I hope you have had a fun and fulfilling half decade... if someone were to ask me what my favorite part has been of the last five years, I'd have to say, 'all of it'. We love you to the moon and back, Jaxon. Happy Birthday!

Love you,
Mom and Dad

fred

Last year, we welcomed Fred the elf to our family. Tonight, he returned to our house from a long year at the North Pole.

I have never seen two kids so opposite.

One scared to death, clinging to me for dear life (Kiley) and the other bouncing off the walls with wonder and excitement (Jaxon) and a million different questions about how he got there, can he turn his head and see us, how does he watch us when we're at school, can he hear us, and on and on and on...

Let the month of Elf on the Shelf (and a few hours of good behavior) begin...

bedtime

Many families have very specific bedtime routines for their kids. I'm not sure how ours compares, but I'm willing to bet that someday in the not so distant future, I'm going to miss ours. I can't imagine not spending time before going to bed, reading books and watching music videos with my kids, talking about the day... it's one of my most favorite times of the day. And also the most chaotic.

As Scott said tonight. It is both the worst 20 minutes and the best 20 minutes of the day.

Here's a quick rundown of the 20+ minute routine...

Step 1: Set the timer. We started this with Jaxon when he had a hard time listening and now we use it for everything. We set the timer for bedtime, leaving the park, sometimes eating dinner... it's a tangible timeframe that he can theoretically understand. Though it always comes with 5 more minutes....

Step 2: Watch a show and have a snack. Unless of course you lost one or both of these throughout your daily events via poor behavior. If there weren't any consequences, one could expect to have a fruit snack, popcorn, fruit, or if you've really been good- fruit rollups or Gushers. I know. Don't scold us! We're doing the best we can!

Step 3: The race. In our old place we had quite the runway to race through the living room, through the kitchen, and to the bathroom. Here, it's straight up the stairs. Still a good race. But if Jaxon doesn't win, then it really wasn't a race (he currently makes up all the rules- we just follow them).

Step 4: Brush teeth, go potty. This usually involves Kiley and Jaxon on the same stool battling for positions at the sink. Most recently it has involved them brushing with two toothbrushes at the same time. Better coverage, perhaps? Probably not. At this point it's just difficult to argue.

Step 5: Kiley finds something to play with- usually something 'pretty' and reads us some books.

 

We usually give Jaxon the option of books or videos. The rock star that he is, he always chooses to watch music videos.

Occasionally he will perform for us too...

And let me tell you... it is very difficult to find appropriate music videos for this kid. He's got the words to the Kesha, Gonna Die Young song memorized and likes to rock out to this. We let him watch the version that just has the lyrics pop across the screen with the music. We've approved most Taylor Swift and Kelly Clarkson songs and many of the Train songs. Carrie Underwood's Blown Away has been banned ever since Jaxon had nightmares that we were all killed in the 'tomato' (tornado). To this day, if there are thunderstorms, he asks me about 'tomatos'.

 

 

Step 6: 'You cuddle me mommy'?  

And so the process begins... hugs and kisses, gobbles and tucks... blankets and books in bed... choosing which stuffed animal is going to make the cut today (sorry lamb/puppy-you have really gotten the shaft lately!)... and the water. Oh my goodness, who would have known something so simple could cause so much strife. If it's not in exactly the right spot, somene throws a tantrum. And every other night Kiley decides if she wants ice or doesn't want ice. And if you did it wrong, boy does she let you know!

 

Step 7: Turn on the fans, turn off the light.

 

Step 8: Leave the room.

Me: "I'll come check on you guys in ten minutes."

Kiley: "Don't check on me mommy. Just Jaxon."

 

Step 9: Wait for it....

 

Step 10: Jaxon either has to tell me something, has to poop, or needs more water. Inevitable.

 

and then...peace and quiet are a beautiful thing...

i do. again and again.

this weekend, my sister and law said 'i do' to her best friend allen.

what a great couple.

 

they remind me a lot of two people i know from long ago.

about seven years to be exact.

 

nearly 18 years ago, i met and fell in love with my best friend. i'll never forget that high school football game at Eden Prairie- I'm sure we lost but I couldn't care less.

 

I had just asked a five year old to ask my future husband to the Sadie Hawkins dance for me. I thought it clever and cute. Never did I think i'd be marrying my date and calling his five year old brother an in-law!

 

but i digress.

 

we've been through a lifetime together in 18 years of friendship and 7 years of marriage. never a dull moment in our house it seems. through all the ups and downs though, i'd do it all over again. how can you really go wrong when you marry your best friend?

 

especially since he gave me these bright shining stars...

 

 

 

i love you honiez. happy anniversary! hugs and kisses to you and best of wishes.

 

jenny and allen- we wish you both an eternity of love and joy, happiness and laughter. you're certainly off to a good start!

God must be a man...

I'm pretty sure God must be a man. If He is the one controlling Minnesota weather, then most definately He is a man.

Today it is a beautiful 65-70 degrees in Minnesota. And November is right around the corner.

And for the second weekend in a row, I've heard, 'It's going to be the last nice day. It would be a shame if I didn't play golf. And everyone else is doing it.'

I mean, how can I say no? It keeps me in 'best wife ever' status and allows me to take advantage of Scott's wallet after a good night of poker.

So he went to have his fun.

But we're fun people too!

And we enjoyed a most lovely Fall morning at Ammodts Apple Orchard in Stillwater.

And you might think pictures of kids at the orchard/hay maze/cow train could get boring and old. But they don't for this mom. I could just keep snappin' all day long.

The 'car' Jaxon and Kiley chose didn't have a working seatbelt, so I told Jaxon he needed to hang on to Kiley and make sure she didn't fall out. Even though the train went about two miles an hour. He immediately put his arms around her waist and didn't let go until it stopped.

 Such a good big brother. (Until he pushed her down the slide ten minutes later. But that's neither here nor there).

Then we had some fun in the hay maze, which wasn't so much a maze as it was just a bunch of hay bales to climb over and under. Jaxon had fun popping up here...

...and there...

 

 and here...

Kiley was zoning out with her paci...

 'till I asked to see her pretty smile... and she complied, for a nano-second.

Finally, we made our way to pick some apples. But the apples had all been picked. There were hardly any left on the trees. Until Jaxon found this one! He was quite excited...

 And then he made it his mission to find one for Kiley and me. So thoughtful.

Our little Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum.

 

 Thanks God. For the super awesome weather and the super fun day.

my biggest fan

Dear Jaxon and Kiley,

Usually I write about you two. How you're driving me crazy. How you won't go to bed at night. The endless questions, with no answers. The constant chatter. Those sweet little voices telling me, 'I love you' or 'I want to marry you'. I write about the adventures we have together. The stories you tell and the ones I make up because I don't know the answers to your many questions.

Today, I thought I'd share a story with you about your dad.

Just in case (this will never happen, but just in case) I forget to tell you, or show you, just how much he means to us, how important he is in our life and how much we love him.

This is a story about a summer of accomplishment and love. And how your dad helped me through it.

Sometime in the Spring, my friend Monica suggested we do a triathalon (400yd swim, 10m bike, 2m run). Sure, I thought. How hard can this be?

And so, I signed up for the race without even telling your dad. And I didn't even own a bike yet. Nor did I realize I had no clue how to swim. And that I was terrified of the water.

When I told Scott, I could almost hear him saying what was undoubtedly in his head at that time- 'Here we go again.'.

But he didn't say it.

He started researching bikes for me. And asking his friends which kind I should buy. He even returned my first one for me and let me buy a nicer, faster one (which I really love).

And then the training began.

Nearly every Saturday morning in July and August, Monica and I had a standing date at 7am to swim/bike/run (or whatever we could muster on those days).

And nearly every Saturday morning I'd come home to an egg skillet, a farmers' market omelet, or homemade waffles and a glass of water just waiting for me.

And even though he couldn't come watch me race, I knew he was worried about me. He texted me right after I was done to make sure I hadn't drowned. And he let me live on my 'high' for a couple days. What an amazing experience that was.

After the race, or sometime before, I think is when I told Scott about the Duathalon. I wanted to be called an Iron Girl. And so before i knew what i was doing, we had signed up for the Athleta Iron Girl Duathlon (2m run, 22m bike, 2m run).

And when I woke up at 4:45am to meet Monica at the start line, there were no grumbles. Just 'Good luck honey. See you at the finish line. You'll do great'. Your dad even loaned me his cold gear since it was freezing that day.

Finally, this past weekend, I completed my final distance event of the season- the Twin Cities 10 Miler. And at 5:30 in the morning your dad woke himself up and drove me to the start line. Then he got you all bundled up with Grandma and Grandpa and Zoe to get a spot at the finish line. And when I was done he bundled me with his cold gear.

I say all this, not to brag about my accomplishments (well, sort of). But to show you what a truly amazing dad you have. He's definately been my support, my motivator, and my confidante in all of this.

He's so much more than 'the best maker' or 'the greatest buddy'...

After nearly 18 years of being together, he is my best friend. My biggest fan. My one true love.

I couldn't ask for much more (except for maybe some more of those omelets on Saturday mornings?).

missed me, missed me, now you gotta kiss me

Ah, to see life through childrens' eyes...


On the way home today:

Jaxon: Mom, do you know what Savannah did today?
Me: No, what?
Jaxon: She kissed me. On the belly.
Me: Oh, that's funny. What did you do?
Jaxon: I kissed her belly.
Me: Hmmm. So why do you think she did that?
Jaxon: I think we're going to get married someday.

In the car yesterday:
Listening to a pop song (could be anything really), but something about men and women not getting along and sounded like Kesha...
Jaxon: Mom, why does she keep saying 'mmmmph' (sort of a grunting sound).
Me: Hm, I don't know. Maybe she's frustrated.
Jaxon: I just don't know why she does that.
Me; Yeah, I'm not sure.
Jaxon: I guess she's mad that he won't play with her.
Me: Right. Something like that.

I can't keep up really. These kids are growing so quickly, I just don't even have time to research what to say. I need some guidance sometimes... the questions are starting to get more complicated. Things like, why doesn't so and so play with me? And when are you ever gonig to marry me mommy? And can't I have the same shoes as Devin?

Things really do seem to be moving so fast lately. I find one of my favorite times of the day is at night when the kids are in bed- for obvious reasons- but also because they are just so innocent. And sweet.

They don't talk back. They don't hit or kick their emotions out. They are peaceful. Serene. Recharging their batteries for the next day. I love to watch them and just take a few moments to capture their faces. Their features. Their crazy bedtime routines and rituals (no ice, just water; over here, not there; this blanket, not that one, etc.)

And I love that Jaxon falls asleep almost every night reading the book that Grandma made for him- Jaxon's ABC's and the one I made for Scott. He often has it opened at one of the pages or it's fallen on his face, taking in all the memories and pictures of family...

If only we coul keep them small and innocent like this for just a little bit longer. But instead, I know tomorrow I'll be faced with 'Missed Me, Missed Me, now you gotta Kiss Me, and 'Mom, stop staring at me and smiling, I know you love me' (with a big eye roll). We'll go to Target and he'll sing the entire Taylor Swift chorus to 'Never get back together'. He'll climb the tallest slide at Lookout Bridge and make best new friends in two minutes or run around the store with a kid he just met. We'll walk in to his classroom and I'll watch the girls giggle and flirt with him and I'll notice the cool, macho look he gives them. He'll ask harder questions and challenge me in ways I'm not sure I'm ready for...

Feels like some kind of adventure ride we're on... can't wait for the next part.



"I always wanted to invent something that would move around & make funny noises & would change the world as we know it & I forgot all about that until we had kids & now I see I came pretty close." -Brian Andreas, Story People

preschool and polar bears

Change is certainly in the air... you can feel it. And we've felt it in our house.

Earlier this month, Scott raised some questions about the care our children were receiving at their in-home daycare. Not to get into too many details, but we ended up moving to a center-based program. While it was a tough transition at first, it has been so wonderful for our kids--they really seem to love it so far, even Kiley has warmed up to the idea after crying her first week there.

Here's a picture of their first day of preschool (Jaxon) and preschool discovery (Kiley).

 

Jaxon has been chasing girls there too. Yesterday when I picked him up from school, there was another little girl being picked up- she was cute, blond, and wearing a Vikings Cheerleader outfit.

 

Jaxon just looked at me as she was leaving, and said, "mom, there's something I need to do. Okay, I said. I need to give someone a hug so I'll be right back." The girl, who I would later find out was Audrey, had already made it to the front of the school with her mom. Jaxon ran through the halls chasing her with teachers telling him to stop, wait for your mom. 'Oh, it's okay, I said. He's chasing a girl'. They all just looked at me and shook their heads. Good luck they said.

 

School has made Kiley exhausted every night. She is out within minutes of her head hitting the pillow. And she takes close to three hour naps on the weekends. But I think even she is learning a lot so far. She's been singing songs and has started using a big girl cup without a lid at home. She wants to everything herself- not like she didn't before, but even moreso now. And she went potty on the potty chair! The past few weeks she's been sitting on the potty chair after she goes in her diaper. Last night, she actually went in the potty!

 

I feel like we're in for a lot more changes in the near future... I can hardly believe some of the things Jaxon is saying and asking us...

 

This morning we went to the zoo with our good friends Abby, Calvin and Audra while the dads golfed together.

 

We were at the polar bear exhibit when Abby and I started talking about what it would be like to have another one (kid, not polar bear).

 

And that's when it really hit me.

 

I don't so much want another one as I don't want to lose these ones. I'm scared of them growing up. Of them not needing me anymore. Scared that I'll never have that little baby to take care of anymore. No more sweet little bear hugs and nose kisses. Holding hands and picking them up when they fall... The more independent they get, the easier it gets. And the harder it gets. It's like being in a pit of joy and sorrow all at the same time.  How can that possibly be?

 

 And what sucks, really sucks? Is that according to my mom, that feeling doesn't go away for a really long time, if ever.

Ugh. Who knew polar bear exhibits could be so powerful. Thanks Como Zoo.