The Good:
My niece, Zoe, spent the night with us on Saturday. I don't get to see her very much, so when I do, it's always a treat. To hear what's new in the 9-year old world (how to make an electic circuit from a battery), and what never changes (still likes cheese pizza and cookies).
On Sunday morning (today), we went to the Minnesota Zoo. I had gotten the free pass at the library again for the second time this summer (so lucky!).
We had a ton of fun even though it was quite hot for mid-October and the bees were swarming our sticky stroller like they knew it was thier last feeding of the year.
The Bad:
Scott 'forgot' he had a fishing trip this weekend. We really missed him. And we didn't get to do some of the things I had wanted to do this weekend, like Harvest Fest and Apple Picking.
Also bad- the movie titled 'Adventuers of a Teenage Dragonslayer.' Next time Jaxon wants to pick, I think I'll need to exercise a little more oversight.
The Ugly:
Saturday night.
I had a baby shower to attend on Saturday afternoon, so my brother watched the kids with Zoe. Jaxon easily convinced Cory that he did not need a nap and apparently Kiley followed suit. Needless to say, I had some crabby kids on my hands.
A few slices of pizza, a fun dip full of sugar, and 18,000 germs from the most disgustingly crowded Chuck E Cheeses later... and we were on borrowed time. The kids were falling apart and so I quickly tried to move us along on the bedtime routine.
What ensued was not pretty. It was downright awful.
My niece on the couch watching her shows on TV. Jaxon screaming at me and hitting me. Kiley shreeking rather loudly. It was all too much for this tired, slightly emotional, somewhat selfish (?) mom. Was it so difficult to just go to bed? Couldn't they see I needed 'my time'? Didn't they know I just wanted to sit down for a minute and maybe eat a snack or drink a cold beverage in silence? And why does this always happen to me? Scott never has a problem putting these kids to bed.
After it was over (and kids were soundly asleep), I laid on thier floor and cried...
I hope I never lose my temper like that again. Though I know I might. (Don't worry, I didn't do anything too crazy!)
I hope I can always try to see the world through my kids' eyes, instead of making them see through mine. Though I know this will be tough.
I hope my children know, that no matter what they do, how mad they make me, and how much they push my buttons; I will love them unconditionally. Though I know they won't always understand.
I hope I can always take a step back from my 'madness' and say, 'I'm sorry.' and 'I love you.', even when it's hard because I might still be mad.
I really, really hope that we can get back on a good sleep schedule. Though I know I am probably doomed for a good decade or two.
You know what's so great? Today's a new day. And the kids...they'll only remember the good, not the ugly. It's always harder for us to forgive ourselves than it is for our little ones to forgive our failures.
ReplyDeleteHope you got some rest. Maybe you should "forget" a spa weekend one of these days?
xoxo